We lived near the beach when the kids were pretty little. I am not a huge fan of the beach, so our beach trips were pretty limited.
While laying on hot sand and getting knocked over by waves isn’t my idea of a great time, I can get behind cracking up over some well-timed beach jokes.
Print these jokes out and enjoy them while you dream of a sandy day in the sun OR while you’re making the drive to your favorite beach spot.
Funny Beach Jokes for Kids
You’ll love these funny beach jokes for kids almost as much as they do!
- How do you make an octopus laugh? – With TEN-tickles!
- What’s the most common insect found on the beach? – A beach buggy!
- What do you call seagulls that live near the bay? – Bagels.
- Why should you never blame a dolphin for doing anything wrong? – Because they never do it on porpoise!
- Where do sheep go on vacation? – The Baaa-hamas.
- Why don’t oysters share their pearls? – Because they’re shellfish!
- What do you call a lazy crayfish? – A slobster!
- What kind of music do killer whales like? – They listen to the orca-stra!
Ocean Jokes for Kids
If you’re looking specifically for funny jokes about the ocean or jokes about the sea, this section is for you.
- what did one ocean say to the other ocean – nothing they just waved
- How do we know that the ocean is friendly? – It waves!
- Who cleans the ocean? – The mermaids.
- What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? – A nervous wreck.
- Why can’t the ocean take a joke? – Because it’s too salty.
Funny Beach Puns
Everyone loves a good pun… these are extra funny beach puns.
- Why is the beach always so confident? – It’s 100% shore.
- Why didn’t the poodle want to go to the beach? – It didn’t want to be a hot dog.
- What does a mermaid use to call her friends? – A shell phone, of course.
- What did the lobsterman say when his crate turned up empty? – It a-piers we have a problem.
- How do you cut an ocean in two? – With a sea-saw.
Funny Water Jokes
Water jokes are fun, whether you’re dreaming of the beach or actually dipping your toe in the water.
- What did one tide pool say to the other tide pool? – Show me your mussels.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Water. Water who? Water you waiting for? Open the door!
- What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? – It gets wet.
- Who carries out operations in water? – A sturgeon.
- Why do male dogs float on water? – Because they’re good buoys.
- What do you call a beach that keeps losing sand? – A shore loser
- What do you call a cat who lives at the beach? – Sandy claws.
- Why is the sand under the dock so resistant? – It doesn’t give in to pier pressure.
- What do you pay to spend a day on the beach? – Sand dollars.
- What would you find on a haunted beach? – A sand-witch!
Shark Jokes with Bite
The jokes that follow are all about sea creatures. Shark jokes, fish jokes, jellyfish jokes, and sea turtle jokes. For other jokes about animals click here.
- Where do sharks go on vacation? – Finland!
- What happened when the shark got famous? – He became a starfish.
- What is a shark’s favorite sci-fi show – Shark Trek
- What do you get when you cross a shark with a parrot?- An animal that will talk your head off!
- What are a shark’s two most favorite words? – Man overboard.
Funny Fish Jokes for Kids
- What do you get when you combine an elephant with a fish? – Swimming trunks!
- What do sea monsters eat? – Fish and ships!
- Where do fish sleep? – On the sea bed!
- Why don’t fish play soccer? – Because they’re scared of nets!
- What did the shark say when he ate a clownfish? – This tastes a little funny!
- What is a shark’s favorite sandwich? – Peanut butter and jellyfish!
- What’s a shark’s favorite breakfast food? A jellyfish-filled donut.
- What do you call a jellyfish on a plane? – Flightoplankton.
- Why was the jellyfish sad? – There is no peanut butter fish.
- Why did the jellyfish fart? – He ate too many jellybeans.
Sea Turtle Jokes
- What do turtles, eggs, and beaches all have? – Shells.
- What do you get when you cross a turtle with a giraffe? A turtle-neck.
- What kind of pictures do sea turtles take? – Shellfies.
- What do you call a turtle with a camera? – A snapping turtle.
- What do you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine? -A slowpoke.
Share your favorite beach jokes in the comments!
For more silly fun, check out these books:
- Silly Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link
- Lots of Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link
- The Big Book of Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link