57 Water Jokes and Puns That the Whole Family Can Dive Into

Let’s have a little water fun today! These water jokes, water puns, and water riddles are perfect for a day at the pool or a rainy day jumping in puddles.

Visit some of our other joke and riddle collections: beach jokes, summer jokes, camping riddles, water riddles, and beach riddles.

Water Jokes and Puns

Water Jokes for Kids

Splish, splash, giggle and laugh. water jokes get the waves of laughter rolling in.

  • Where can you find an ocean with no water? – On a map.
  • What kind of rocks are never underwater? – Dry ones.
  • What do you call an old snowman? – Water.
  • What kind of water cannot freeze? – Hot water.
  • What kind of water does an Angel like? – Holy Water.
  • Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean? – They dropped out of school.
  • What keeps a dock floating above water? – Pier pressure.
  • Why does water never laugh at jokes? – It isn’t a fan of dry humor.
  • What do mermaids sleep on? – Water beds.
  • Why do male dogs float in water? – Because they’re good buoys.

How do you make a water bed more bouncy? – You use spring water.

  • How did the raindrop ask another raindrop on a date? – He asked her “Water you doing tonight?”
  • What do you get when you pour boiling water down a rabbit hole? – Hot cross bunnies.
  • Where do water droplets go to settle arguments? – The Supreme Quart.
  • What state does the Mississippi River flow in? -Liquid.
  • There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water. – Number one. And number two.
  • Why did the ocean break up with the pond? – She thought he was too shallow.
  • Why isn’t holy water used in vaccines? – Because you can’t take the lord’s name in vein.
Water Jokes and Puns

Water Riddles with Answers

  • Wash me and I won’t be clean, don’t wash me, and I’ll be clean. What am I? – Water.
  • You’ll probably use me for fights in the summer, if I leak in your house, call the plumber! – Water.
  • If you’re swimming in the ocean and an alligator attacks you, what do you do? – Nothing, there aren’t alligators in the ocean!
  • I’m the child of water, but when you take me back to the water I’ll die. Who am I? – Ice.
  • Three men jump into the water but only two come out with wet hair. How? – The third man was bald.

Water Puns

These water puns are a bit shallow.

  • RIP Boiled water….you will be mist.
  • I never believed water could freeze… but now icy.
  • A friend dug a hole in the garden and filled it with water. I think he meant well.
  • How dew you dew? It has been a long time since I have sea-n you.
  • Lake her mother, she too is a world class swimmer.
  • I will alwaves love you!
  • My water bottle told me a joke, it cracked me up!
  • I don’t need hydration, water you talking about?
  • Things aren’t always as they steam
  • So I started this new underwater band-project.  I hope you guys like aquapella.
  • I created a cocktail called the Jellyfish. It’s 98% water.
  • Water never laughs at jokes because it doesn’t like dry humor.
  • The ocean broke up with the pond because it was too shallow.
  • The ocean is always on time because it likes to stay current.
  • Two raindrops said to the third, “Two’s company, but three’s a cloud.”
  • Water you thinking? This is going to be pun-derful!
  • At a sea level, I’m still punnier than you.
  • The ocean was very s-Pacific with its request.
  • Well water is good for you.
  • I’m feeling so full, must’ve drunk the ocean.
  • The water’s wedding was so beautiful; it was well-organized and quite fluid.
  • We’re having a splash party, hope you’re up for some wet humor!
  • I’m reading a book on anti-gravity water, it’s impossible to put down.
  • I was going to make a river joke… but I don’t think it’s current.

Related Post: Sand Puns for Kids

  • Every time I take a drink from a bottle, it keeps pouring back. Must be spring water.
  • Feeling a bit over-floored by all these puns?
  • Watery going to do?
  • Don’t wait. Seas the moment and shine.
  • I’m tide of all these mediocre puns.
  • Dive been thinking about you all day.
  • Wave goodbye to your worries, let’s ride this pun wave.
  • Drip, drop, make the gloominess stop.
  • Don’t keep things bottled up, pour them out.
  • Thirsty for a laugh? You’re in the right stream.

Add your favorite water joke or water pun to the comments.

Print your Water Jokes, Water Puns, and Water Riddles

Sometimes, reading the jokes on your phone is perfect. Other times, printing them out can be even better.

Take these water jokes and water puns with you to the pool or beach. That way, you can bring them out without touching your phone!

Click here to get your printable water jokes and water puns.

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