Funny Fish Jokes to get your Fisherman Laughing

Vacation is coming near and we want our kids to enjoy it as much as we do. So here’s a collection of jokes about fishing you can enjoy and add to your gill-ty pleasure.

For more water fun check out some of our other joke collections: shark jokes, beach riddles, and beach jokes.

Printable Fish Jokes

Print your Fish Jokes here.

Funny Jokes about Fish 

• How do you talk to a fish? – You drop it a line!
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? – Fsh.
• Why are fish so easy to weigh? – Because they have their own scales.
• What kind of fish only comes out at night? – A starfish.
• How do shellfish get to the hospital? –  In a clambulance.
• Why don’t fish like basketball? – Because they’re afraid of the net!
• Where does a fish keep its money? – A riverbank.
• What’s the fastest fish in the lake? – A motor-Pike.
• Why did the fish get bad grades? – Because it was below sea level.
• What day of the week do all fish dislike the most? – Fryday.
• ​Why do fish swim in schools? – Because they can’t walk.

Fish Dad Jokes

• What would you call a fish wearing a tie? – So-fish-ticated.
• What do you think is a pirate’s favorite fish? – Swordfish.
• Where do fish sleep? – On the riverbed.
• What do fish take to stay healthy? – Vitamin Sea.
• Why are fish boots so warm? – They have electric eels!

Knock-knock Fish Jokes

• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Bless you!
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Artie Fish. Artie Fish who? Artie Fish-el Intelligence. 
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Fish you a Merry Christmas, we fish you a Merry Christmas!
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Fish-ious temper you have there, you need to clam down!

Jellyfish Jokes

• What did a shark eat with its peanut butter sandwich? – A jellyfish.
• What is the most envious fish? – The jelly-fish.
• Have you heard the one about the jellyfish? – It’s a real no-brainer.
• What language do jellyfish speak? – Gelatin.
• What car does a jellyfish drive? – Invertible.

Salmon Jokes

• What do you call a religious fish poem? – A Psalmon.
• What happens when you put Nutella on salmon? – You get salmonella.
• What is a fish’s favorite game? – Salmon Says!
• Why don’t salmon watch cable television? – They prefer streams.
• What do you call a Salmon that sets a good example? – A roe model.

Tuna Jokes

• What’s the difference between a piano and a fish? – You can tune a piano but you can’t tuna fish!
• What do you call a fish that needs help with his or her vocals? – Autotuna.
• What game show do fish love the most? – Name that tuna!
• What’s better than a tuna sandwich? – A three-na sandwich
• How do fish find their way in the dark? – They follow the light tuna.

Catfish Jokes

• What kind of fish eats mice? – A catfish.
• Why did the dog jump from the boat into the ocean? – He thought he saw a catfish.
• What do you use to catfish on the Internet? – You have to use clickbait.
• What does a catfish chase after? A string ray!

Clownfish Jokes

• What did the shark say after eating a clownfish? – That tasted a little bit funny!
• Why did the scuba divers start laughing when they got near the coral reefs? – They saw a clownfish.
• What is a clown fish’s favorite artist? – Eminemone.

Cod Jokes

• Who granted the fish’s wish? – The fairy cod mother!
• What’s the head of the underwater mafia called? – The Codfather.
• What’d the fisherman say to the magician? – Pick a cod. Any cod.
• What’s a fisherman’s favorite video game? – COD.
• What did the pet fish say when the cook served fish steak for dinner? – Oh my Cod!

Goldfish Jokes

• What do you call a fish with lots of money? – A goldfish.
• Where do goldfish love to travel? – Usually just around the globe.
• What is the most valuable fish you can catch? – A goldfish.
• What did the goldfish say when he got fed? – Tank poo.
• How do you make a goldfish old? – You take away the g.

Bass Jokes

• What do you call a fish that won’t shut up? – A big-mouthed bass.

Bait Jokes

• What’s worse than reading a clickbait title? – Clicking on it.
• What type of fish should you use to catch other fish? – Beta fish.
• Why couldn’t the troll catch any fish? – Because other people took the bait.
• How do you catch a Swedish fish? – With a gummy worm as bait

Flying Fish Jokes

• What do you call a fish on a plane? – Flying fish.
• What’s a pelican’s favorite sport? – Fly fishing!
• Where does a fish end-up when it flies? – A magic carp.

Fisherman Jokes

• What did the fisherman want? – A gillfriend.
• What did the fisherman say to his friend while fishing? – He was feeling fin-tastic.
• What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? – Let minnow if you get any.
• What kind of musical instrument can a fisherman easily play? – Ac-cod-ian.
• Where do fishermen go to get their hair cut? – To the bobber shop.

Funny Fish Puns

• If you’re going for roe-mance, then you’ll want to consider the caviar.
• When your fish boss is watching, you’d better look e-fish-ent.
• The first book of the fish bible is called Craytion.
• Surfing the net is great, unless, of course, you’re a fish.
• Cod this be any punnier?

Share your favorite funny fish jokes in the comments.

For more giggly fun, check out these books:

• Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link
• Laugh-out-Loud Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link
• National Geographic Kids Just Joking (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link