Funny Fish Jokes to get your Fisherman Laughing
Vacation is coming near and we want our kids to enjoy it as much as we do. So here’s a collection of jokes about fishing you can enjoy and add to your gill-ty pleasure.
For more water fun check out some of our other joke collections: shark jokes, beach riddles, and beach jokes.
Printable Fish Jokes
Print your Fish Jokes here.
Funny Jokes about Fish
- How do you talk to a fish? – You drop it a line!
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? – Fsh.
- Why are fish so easy to weigh? – Because they have their own scales.
- What kind of fish only comes out at night? – A starfish.
- How do shellfish get to the hospital? – In a clambulance.
- Why don’t fish like basketball? – Because they’re afraid of the net!
- Where does a fish keep its money? – A riverbank.
- What’s the fastest fish in the lake? – A motor-Pike.
- Why did the fish get bad grades? – Because it was below sea level.
- What day of the week do all fish dislike the most? – Fryday.
- Why do fish swim in schools? – Because they can’t walk.
Fish Dad Jokes
- What would you call a fish wearing a tie? – So-fish-ticated.
- What do you think is a pirate’s favorite fish? – Swordfish.
- Where do fish sleep? – On the riverbed.
- What do fish take to stay healthy? – Vitamin Sea.
- Why are fish boots so warm? – They have electric eels!
Knock-knock Fish Jokes
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Bless you!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Artie Fish. Artie Fish who? Artie Fish-el Intelligence.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Fish you a Merry Christmas, we fish you a Merry Christmas!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Fish-ious temper you have there, you need to clam down!
- What did a shark eat with its peanut butter sandwich? – A jellyfish.
- What is the most envious fish? – The jelly-fish.
- Have you heard the one about the jellyfish? – It’s a real no-brainer.
- What language do jellyfish speak? – Gelatin.
- What car does a jellyfish drive? – Invertible.
- What do you call a religious fish poem? – A Psalmon.
- What happens when you put Nutella on salmon? – You get salmonella.
- What is a fish’s favorite game? – Salmon Says!
- Why don’t salmon watch cable television? – They prefer streams.
- What do you call a Salmon that sets a good example? – A roe model.
- What’s the difference between a piano and a fish? – You can tune a piano but you can’t tuna fish!
- What do you call a fish that needs help with his or her vocals? – Autotuna.
- What game show do fish love the most? – Name that tuna!
- What’s better than a tuna sandwich? – A three-na sandwich
- How do fish find their way in the dark? – They follow the light tuna.
- What kind of fish eats mice? – A catfish.
- Why did the dog jump from the boat into the ocean? – He thought he saw a catfish.
- What do you use to catfish on the Internet? – You have to use clickbait.
- What does a catfish chase after? A string ray!
- What did the shark say after eating a clownfish? – That tasted a little bit funny!
- Why did the scuba divers start laughing when they got near the coral reefs? – They saw a clownfish.
- What is a clown fish’s favorite artist? – Eminemone.
- Who granted the fish’s wish? – The fairy cod mother!
- What’s the head of the underwater mafia called? – The Codfather.
- What’d the fisherman say to the magician? – Pick a cod. Any cod.
- What’s a fisherman’s favorite video game? – COD.
- What did the pet fish say when the cook served fish steak for dinner? – Oh my Cod!
- What do you call a fish with lots of money? – A goldfish.
- Where do goldfish love to travel? – Usually just around the globe.
- What is the most valuable fish you can catch? – A goldfish.
- What did the goldfish say when he got fed? – Tank poo.
- How do you make a goldfish old? – You take away the g.
- What do you call a fish that won’t shut up? – A big-mouthed bass.
- What’s worse than reading a clickbait title? – Clicking on it.
- What type of fish should you use to catch other fish? – Beta fish.
- Why couldn’t the troll catch any fish? – Because other people took the bait.
- How do you catch a Swedish fish? – With a gummy worm as bait
Flying Fish Jokes
- What do you call a fish on a plane? – Flying fish.
- What’s a pelican’s favorite sport? – Fly fishing!
- Where does a fish end-up when it flies? – A magic carp.
- What did the fisherman want? – A gillfriend.
- What did the fisherman say to his friend while fishing? – He was feeling fin-tastic.
- What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? – Let minnow if you get any.
- What kind of musical instrument can a fisherman easily play? – Ac-cod-ian.
- Where do fishermen go to get their hair cut? – To the bobber shop.
Funny Fish Puns
- If you’re going for roe-mance, then you’ll want to consider the caviar.
- When your fish boss is watching, you’d better look e-fish-ent.
- The first book of the fish bible is called Craytion.
- Surfing the net is great, unless, of course, you’re a fish.
- Cod this be any punnier?
Share your favorite funny fish jokes in the comments.
For more giggly fun, check out these books:
- Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link
- Laugh-out-Loud Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link
- National Geographic Kids Just Joking (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link