121 Corny Jokes for Kids You’ll Love to Hate

Jokes, jokes, and more jokes. This collection of corny jokes for kids will get you giggling, even if you don’t want to.

We use jokes for many things around here; check out the printable corny jokes section below for some ideas.

Corny Jokes for Kids

What makes a corny joke? It’s the eye roll that comes along with the giggle.

• What do you call a pig that does karate? – A pork chop.
• Why did the bike fall over? – It was two tired.
• What did the policeman say to his belly button? – You’re under a vest.
• Why did the man get hit by a bike every day? – He was stuck in a vicious cycle.
• Why do people say “break a leg” when you go on stage? – Because every play has a cast.
• What do you call an alligator detective? – An investi-gator.
• What kind of ghost has the best hearing? – The eeriest.

Related Post: school-appropriate jokes

• How did the dead brother and his dead brother resemble each other? – They were dead ringers.
• Why are there gates around cemeteries? – Because people are dying to get in.
• Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pen?- Because it’s pointless.
• Why did the scarecrow win an award? – Because he was outstanding in his field.
• Where can you buy soup in bulk? – The stock market.
• If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do elves get? – Mistle-toes.
• What’s brown and sticky? – A stick.
• What did the yoga instructor say when her landlord tried to evict her? – Namaste.

How do you tell if a vampire is sick? – See if he is coffin.

• What do you call fake spaghetti? – An im-pasta.
• When do computers overheat? – When they need to vent.
• Why do bees have sticky hair? – Because they use honeycombs.
• Why can’t your ear be 12 inches long? – Because then it would be a foot.
• What do you call a factory that sells good products? – A satis-factory.
• What kind of music do planets like?- Neptunes.
• What do you call a man that irons clothes? – Iron Man.
• Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? – He couldn’t see himself doing it.
• How did the barber win the race? – He knew a shortcut.

• What did one plate say to the other plate? – Dinner is on me.
• Why did the student eat his homework? – Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
• What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses? – A coconut on vacation.
• Where do you find a cow with no legs? – Right where you left it.
• Why was the white car white? – Because they didn’t paint it black.
• If athletes get athlete’s foot, then what do elves get? – They get Mistle-toes.

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• What did the science book say to the math book? – You got problems
• What do you call a box with three ducks in it? – A box of Quakers.
• What do you get when you pick a pigs nose? – Ham-Boogers!
• What did the llama say when he got kicked out of the zoo? – “Alpaca my bags!”
• Have you heard the joke about the banana peel? – Never mind it slipped out of my mind!
• What is fast, loud and crunchy? – A rocket chip.
• Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? – Because she was stuffed.
• What has ears but cannot hear? – A cornfield.
• What did the left eye say to the right eye? – Between us, something smells.
• What did the limestone say to the geologist? – Don’t take me for granite.
• Why does a seagull fly over the sea? – Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.
• What kind of water can’t freeze? – Hot water.
• What kind of tree fits in your hand? – A palm tree.
• What’s a piece of bread’s least favorite chore? – Doing a loaf of laundry.
• What did the bunny say to the carrot? – It’s been nice gnawing you!
• What do you call a sad strawberry? – A blueberry! Because it saw the salad dressing!
• What did the pizza say to the topping? – I never sau-sage a pretty face!
• Which vegetable do sailors hate the most? – Leeks!

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• What do you call a cheese that’s not yours? – Nacho cheese!
• What happens when a grape gets run over crossing the street? – A traffic jam!
• Where does fruit go on vacation? – Pear-is!
• What did the triangle feel sorry for the circle? – Because it’s pointless!
• What do you call a number that can’t stay in one place? – A roamin’ numeral!
• What tool do mathematicians use most? – Multi-pliers!
• Why did the robber take a bath before he left the scene of the crime? – He wanted to make a clean getaway!
• Why does it take pirates a long time to learn the alphabet? – Because they can spend years at C!

• Why is Cinderella bad at soccer? – Because she’s always running away from the ball!
• Why did the kid cross the playground? – To get to the other slide.
• Why couldn’t the pony sing a lullaby? – She was a little horse.
• What was the first animal in space? – The cow that jumped over the moon.
• Why don’t elephants chew gum? – They do, just not in public.
• What did the banana say to the dog? – Bananas can’t talk.

What do you call a dinosaur fart? – A blast from the past.

• How do you make an octopus laugh? – With ten-tickles.
• What do you call a sleeping bull? – A bull-dozer.
• How do you fit more pigs on a farm? – Build a sty-scraper
• How does a scientist freshen her breath? – With experi-mints.
• How are false teeth like stars? – They come out at night.
• What building in your town has the most stories? – The public library.
• What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? – Finding half a worm.
• What do you say to a rabbit on its birthday? – Hoppy Birthday.

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• What’s the one thing will you get every year on your birthday, guaranteed? – A year older.
• Why do candles always go on the top of cakes? – Because it’s hard to light them from the bottom.
• Are black cats bad luck? – Sure, if you’re a mouse.
• How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? – A pumpkin patch.
• What do you call two witches living together? – Broommates.
• Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? – They were going through a stage!
• Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? – He was outstanding in his field!

What do you call a fake noodle? – An impasta!

• What did the mama cow say to the calf? – It’s pasture bedtime!
• Why can’t a leopard hide? – Because he’s always spotted!
• Why didn’t the dime roll down the hill with the nickel? – Because it had more cents.
• What does a vegan zombie eat? – Graaains.
• Why didn’t princess Elsa get a balloon? – She’d only let it go.
• What do you call a little legume? – A Tinybean.
• What’s a piece of bread’s least favorite chore? – Doing a loaf of laundry.
• What do you call two guys who love math? – Algebros!
• How do you get an astronaut’s baby to stop crying? – You rocket!
• What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? – You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish!
• Why can’t you trust atoms? – They make up everything!

Related Post: Computer Jokes, Computer Puns and Riddles

• Why was the Easter Bunny so upset? – He was having a bad hare day.
• Why did the bacon laugh? – The egg cracked a yolk.
• What do you call a bear with no teeth? – A gummy bear.
• What did one pickle say to the other after they fell out of the jar? – Dill with it
• Why was the weightlifter always annoyed? – Because he worked with dumbbells.
• Is your refrigerator running? – Well then you better catch it before it gets away
• How do you get a squirrel to like you? – Act like a nut.
• What do you call two birds in love? – Tweethearts.

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• What was the first animal in space? – The cow that jumped over the moon.
• What do elves learn in school? – The elf-abet.
• Where do pencils go on vacation? – Pencil-vania.
• Why was the computer cold? – It has a virus.
• What happened when the skunk was on trial? – The judge declared, “Odor in the court, odor in the court!”
• What do you get when you cross an elephant with a fish? – Swimming trunks.
• What does an evil hen lay? – Deviled eggs.
• Why do leprechauns love to garden? – They have green thumbs.
• Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the Valentine’s dance? – His heart wasn’t in it.
• Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? – He had a hole in one.
• Why are cookies and milk a basketball team’s favorite dessert? – They love to dunk.
• What did the baseball glove say to the ball? – Catch you later!
• What kind of shoes do all spies wear? – Sneakers
• Why aren’t koalas actual bears? – The don’t meet the koalafications.
• Why is there a gate around cemeteries? – Because people are dying to get in!

Corny Knock-Knock Jokes

• Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Nobel. Nobel who? Nobel…that’s why I knocked!
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? You’re welcome.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Figs. Figs who? Figs the doorbell, it’s not working!
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Annie. Annie who? Annie thing you can do, I can do too!
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, a cow says mooooo!
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hawaii. Hawaii who? I’m good. Hawaii you?
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lena. Lena who? Lena a little closer and I’ll tell you a joke.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Snow. Snow who? Snow use. The joke is over.

Add your favorite corny jokes to the comments.