78 Computer Jokes, Computer Riddles, and Puns PRINTABLE
Computer jokes and puns are a great way to break the tension when computer issues arise. Computer riddles are great for taking your mind away from the computer for a few minutes.
You might also want to take a byte out of our Knock knock Jokes.
Computer Jokes
Welcome to the motherboard of computer jokes!
- What did the computer do at lunchtime? – It had a byte!
- What do you get if you stuff your computer’s disk drive with herbs? – A thyme machine.
- Why is a computer so smart? – It listens to its motherboard.
- What did the dentist say to the computer? – This won’t hurt a byte.
- What did the computer eat on the moon? – Space bars.
- What do computers eat when they get hungry? – Chips
What do you call a computer hero? – A screen saver
- Why did the computer keep its drink on the windowsill? – It wanted a cold beverage.
- What do you call a computer that sings? – A Dell.
- How does a computer catch a virus? – Through its windows.
- What do you call a cat who wants to sit on you when you’re working on your computer? – A laptop.
- Why did the computer show up at work late? – It had a hard drive.
- Did you hear about the octopus who stopped printing? – It ran out of ink!
- Did you hear about the raccoon who was evicted? – It was moved to trash.
- What did the computer confess at the concert? – “I like big bytes and I cannot lie.”
- How does a computer get drunk? – It takes screenshots.
- Why was the computer always partying? – It had great chips!
- How do computers like to dance? – Disk-o!
- What do computers wear on their feet? – Micro-soft shoes!
- Why was the computer cold? – It left its Windows open!
Related Post: Exam Jokes
- Why was the computer feeling crunchy? – It had too many cookies!
- What’s a computer’s favorite type of music? – Hard-drive Rock!
- Why did the computer go to the spaceship? – To improve its space bar!
- How do computers like their tea? – With a byte of sugar!
- Why did the computer become a gardener? – To improve its root access!
- What’s a computer’s favorite type of tree? – A binary tree!
- How do you know a computer is sleepy? – It starts to lag!
- What do you get when you cross-painted performance artists with a wireless connection? – Blue Man Tooth.
- What kind of connection do trapeze artists use to log onto the internet? – High-wireless.
- What does a baby computer call its father? – Data!
- Which country has the slowest Wi-Fi? – Germany. It’s the wurst!
- The question: What are two things that run slow? – A turtle and Wi-Fi.
- Why did the computer squeak? – Because someone stepped on it’s mouse!
- What do you get when you cross a computer and a lifeguard? – A screensaver!
- Where do all the cool mice live? – In their mousepads.
- What do you get when you cross a computer with an elephant? – Lots of memory!
- How many technical-support agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb? – Press 1 to continue.
- What is the funniest tech hub in California? – Silly-con Valley.
- What do you get when you cross a dog with a tech CEO? – Bark Zuckerberg.
- What doubles as a dance club and computer help desk? – Disco-tech support.
- What did the computer say to the printer? – Stop your paper jamming!
- Why did the computer bring an umbrella? – To stay protected from the rain of viruses!
- How does a computer say hello in Spanish? – ¡Hola, World!
Computer Puns
These computer puns EXCEL at getting a hard-drive laugh.
- We’ll we’ll we’ll … if it isn’t autocorrect.
- Autocorrect can go straight to he’ll.
- Autocorrect has become my worst enema.
- I tried to say, “I’m a functional adult,” but my phone changed it to “fictional adult,” and I feel like that’s more accurate.
- My computer said my password is insecure. Well, maybe if it wasn’t forced to have such strict requirements, it would be more confident.
- My computer’s keyboard and I are in a committed relationship. We’re always attached.
- When data can’t drive, it takes the bus.
- Old programmers never die. They just don’t C very well, or C#.
Related Post: Corny Jokes
- Dead hard drives should be encrypted.
- If you steal my copy of Microsoft Office; I will find you: You have my Word.
- Have you heard of that new band “1023 Megabytes”? They’re pretty good, but they don’t have a gig just yet.
- There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.
- I asked my computer how to boot faster and it said, “Try running!”
- When in doubt, hit ctrl+alt+delete.
- I joined a support group for former computer hackers: Anonymous Anonymous.
- My internet router is in my basement. You could say that I come from a LAN down under.
- An SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables, and asks, “Can I join you?”
- I’m trying to Exchange my family. Meanwhile, I’m maintaining a positive Outlook.
- How am I with PowerPoint? You could say I Excel at it.
Computer Riddles
These printable computer riddles are perfect for when you need a little break from the screen.
- Riddle: You press my keys, but I’m not a piano. I help you create, from poems to your life’s memo. What am I? – Answer: Keyboard
- Riddle: I’m silent but I click, I scroll up and down, with me in your hand, you can navigate around. What am I? – Answer: Mouse
- Riddle: I’m the brain of the machine, where all thoughts process. Without me, computing power would be much less. What am I? – Answer: CPU (Central Processing Unit)
- Riddle: I’m small and portable, a keeper of files. Take me anywhere, store data for miles. What am I? – Answer: USB Drive
- Riddle: I’m your device’s short-term thought, helping run programs that you’ve bought. What am I? – Answer: RAM (Random Access Memory)
Related Post: Car Puns
- Riddle: I execute commands without delay, whether to compute, save or play. What am I? – Answer: Computer
- Riddle: I’m the body connecting every part, making sure they all do their part. What am I? – Answer: Motherboard
- Riddle: I’m a global web, a net that is vast, connecting the world oh so fast. What am I? – Answer: Internet
- Riddle: Not hard to fathom or to install, I am created to perform a task and that’s not all. What am I? – Answer: Software
- Riddle: An unwelcome guest in your device, I may cause damage that’s not nice. What am I? – Answer: Virus
- Riddle: I direct traffic, I’m quite the guide, organizing data that flows worldwide. What am I? – Answer: Router
Related Post: Science Riddles
- Riddle: A barrier against cyber strife, I protect the digital life. What am I? – Answer: Firewall
- Riddle: A digital eye, always awake, in video calls, I partake. What am I? – Answer: Webcam
- Riddle: I provide the juice, the power, and might; without me, your computer can’t take flight. What am I? – Answer: Power Supply
- Riddle: I’m a cord that connects, long and lean, to a network wide and unseen. What am I? – Answer: Ethernet Cable
Print Your Computer Jokes, Computer Riddles and Puns
Do you have a computer class to prepare for? Print out these computer jokes, computer riddles, and puns to bring along!
Click here to get your Computer Jokes printable.Leave your favorite computer joke in the comments.