Funny Santa Jokes for Kids (with Printable)

HO HO HO! It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Time to find out who’s been naughty and nice. 

Here are some more jokes about Santa that are definitely funny and nice. You’ll even find some Santa Knock-Knock jokes. 

And to make the holiday even happier, Christmas jokes for kids, and elf jokes!

Santa jokes

Funny Santa Jokes for Kids

Santa jokes are perfect for this time of year! These are sure to get the kids and the elves laughing.

  • Why is Santa scared of chimneys? – Because he’s claus-trophobic.
  • What do you call Santa’s little helpers? – Subordinate Clauses.
  • Why don’t you ever see Santa Claus in the hospital? – Because he has private elf care.
  • What does Santa eat for breakfast? – Frosted Flakes.
  • Why does Santa have trouble spelling? – He thinks the alphabet has Noel.
  • Where does Santa stay on vacation? – At a ho-ho-hotel.
  • What’s Santa’s favorite potato chip? – Kringles.
  • What do you call a cat who works for Santa? – Santa Claws.
  • Who delivers Christmas presents to cats and dogs? – Santa Paws.
  • What breakfast do Santa and his wife like to eat together? – Mistle-toast.

What’s Santa’s favorite kind of roll? – Carols.

  • Why was Santa having money problems? – He was nickel-less.
  • How can you tell that Santa is real? – You can always sense his presents!
  • What is Santa’s favorite US state to deliver presents? – Idaho-ho-ho!
  • What does Mrs. Claus sing to Santa on his birthday? – Freeze a jolly good fellow! 
  • What’s Santa’s favorite type of music? – Wrap.
  • Why is Santa so good at karate? – He has a black belt.
  • Why does Santa go through the chimney? – Because it soots him.
  • What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? – A rebel without a Claus.
  • How does Santa take pictures? – With his Pole-aroid camera.
  • How much did Santa’s sleigh cost? – It was on the house!

Related Post: Reindeer Jokes and Puns

  • Why was Santa’s little helper so sad? – He had low elf-esteem
  • What’s Santa’s favorite kind of roll? – Carols.
  • What nationality is Santa Claus? – North Polish.
  • Why does Mrs. Claus love the Christmas season? – It makes her feel so santa-mental.
  • What name does Santa use to check in at hotels on beach vacations? – Sandy Claus.
  • Whenever someone asks Santa for help with their Christmas tree, what does he say? – “Fir sure!”
  • What kind of weather is Santa’s favorite? – Sweater weather
  • How does Santa take care of sick people? – He nurses them back to elf.
  • How did Santa’s little helper stop eating cookies? – He used elf control.
  • What does Santa eat for breakfast? – Frosted Flakes.

Where does Santa cash his checks? – At the snow bank.

  • What’s Santa’s favorite candy? – Jolly Ranchers.
  • What’s Santa Claus’s favorite track & field event? – North Pole-vaulting
  • Which of Santa’s reindeer are dinosaurs afraid of? – Comet.
  • How you can tell that Santa is real? – You can always sense his presents.
  • What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a duck? – A Christmas quacker!
  • Which one of Santa’s reindeer has the best moves? – Dancer!
  • What do you call a cat who works for Santa? – Santa Claws!
  • What does Santa spend his wages on? – Jingle Bills!
  • Why doesn’t Santa eat junk food? – Because it’s bad for your elf.
  • Who brings teeth gifts for Christmas? – Santa Floss.
  • What does Santa eat for breakfast? – Mistle toast.
  • Where do Santa’s elves make the just acceptable toys? – In the satisfactory.
  • When Santa doesn’t want to do something, what does he say? – “Snow thanks!”
  • What kind of drink does Santa give to naughty girls and boys? – Coal-a.
  • What’s the difference between a knight and Santa Claus? – One slays a dragon, the other drags a sleigh.
  • How do elves respond when Santa takes attendance? – “Present!”
  • What do you call Kris Kringle when he goes on his wife’s health insurance? – A dependent Claus.
  • Who is Santa’s favorite singer? – Elf-is Presley.
  • What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective? – Santa Clues!
  • What’s as big as Santa but weighs nothing? – Santa’s shadow!

Related Post: Gingerbread Jokes and Puns

  • How do you wash your hands at Christmas? – With hand Santa-tizer.
  • What do you sing at Santa’s birthday party? – Freeze a jolly good fellow.
  • What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride? – A Holly Davidson.
  • What do you call a broke Santa Claus? – Saint-nickel-less.
  • Why did Santa put a clock in his sleigh? – Because he wanted to see time fly!
  • What’s Santa’s go-to doughnut order? – A jolly-filled doughnut.
  • What do Santa’s elves use to help them walk in the slippery snow? – Candy canes.
  • Which of Santa’s friends is the most chill? – Jack Frost.

What happens when Santa’s GPS stops working? – He becomes a lost Claus

  • How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? – Nothing, it was on the house!
  • Why did Santa get a parking ticket last Christmas Eve? – He was making a special delivery and left his sleigh in a snow parking zone.
  • Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee? – Because they’re Santa’s star bucks!
  • Why was Santa disappointed in Rudolph’s report card? – He went down in History.
Santa jokes

Santa Knock Knock Jokes

If you love a knock-knock joke, you’re in the right place. These Santa Knock Knock jokes might become your favorite.

  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Santa. Santa who? Santa body on the roof yet? It’s Christmas Eve!
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Santa. Santa Who? Wait, why am I at the door? I’m supposed to come down the chimney!
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ho Ho. Ho Ho who? That Santa impression definitely needs more work.
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Coal. Coal who? Coal me when Santa’s on his way.
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Santa. Santa who? Santa Christmas card to you. Did you get it?
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Interrupting Santa. Inter– Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Claus. Claus who? Claus I can’t wait any longer!
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Peppermint. Peppermint who? Peppermint sticks for old Santa Nick.
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Abbey. Abbey who? Santa arriving right Abbey.
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Santa. Santa who? Santa Claus is coming to town.
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dewey. Dewey who? Dewey know how long it is until Santa gets here?
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Santa. Santa who? Santa letter to the North Pole.

Print your Santa Jokes

Print these Santa jokes for your trip to visit Santa or to add to your stockings.

Click here to get your printable Santa Jokes.

Add your favorite Santa joke to the comments.

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