Funny Disney Jokes the Whole Family Will Treasure

Disney! Whether you are a Disney fanatic or a casual Disney lover, these funny Disney jokes will be treasured by the whole family.

Check out some of our other joke collections: pirate jokes, poop jokes, and Pokemon jokes.

Disney Jokes for Kids

Print your Disney Jokes

These printable Disney jokes pair beautifully with this printable Disney countdown calendar. Use these together to create even more excitement about your upcoming trip.

Click here for your printable Disney Jokes.

Funny Disney Jokes for Kids

  • Why did Goofy wear two pairs of pants when he played golf? – He heard he might get a hole-in-one.
  • How cold was it at Disney World? – Donald Duck was wearing pants!
  • What Disney character can count the highest? – Buzz Lightyear, to infinity and beyond.
  • Where does Ariel go when one of her friends is missing? – The Lost-and-Flounder Department.
  • What’s a bee’s favorite Disney movie? – Beauty And The Bees.
  • How does Disney World get a tissue to dance? – They put a little Oogie Boogie in it.
  • What is Tarzan’s favorite Christmas Carol? – Jungle Bells.
  • What do you call the Disneyland train when it sneezes? – A choo choo train.
  • What did the 101 Dalmatians say after eating dinner? – That hit the spot.
  • Which Disney movie is about a stupid boyfriend? – Dumb Beau.
  • What’s the opposite of Disney? – Dat knee.

Disney Dad Jokes

  • What did Snow White call her chicken? – Egg White.
  • How do you keep Pumba from charging you? – Take away his credit cards.
  • What do the seven dwarves sing if they see a rainbow on their way to the mine? – High Hue, High Hue!
  • Why did the banana go to see Doc McStuffins? – Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  • How does the ocean say hello to Ariel? – It waves.
Disney Jokes

Mickey Mouse Jokes

  • What happened the first time Mickey and Minnie saw each other? – It was glove at first sight!
  • Why did Mickey Mouse become an astronaut? – So he could visit Pluto.
  • How did Minnie save Mickey from drowning? – Mouse to mouse resuscitation.
  • What does Mickey use to browse the web? – An iPad Minnie.
  • What’s Mickey Mouses’ favorite treat? – Mice cream.
  • What kind of car does Mickey Mouse’s wife drive? – A Minnie van.

Winnie-the-Pooh Jokes

  • What does Winnie-the-Pooh call his girlfriend? – Honey.
  • What did Winnie-the-Pooh say to Jerry Maguire? – “Show me the Honey!”
  • What do Winnie-the-Pooh and Jabba the Hutt have in common? – The same middle name.
  • What does Winnie-the-Pooh say when he cries? – Pooh-hoo.

Princess Jokes

  • Why is Cinderella so bad at soccer? – Because she’s always running away from the ball.
  • What did Snow White say when her photos weren’t ready yet? – Someday my prints will come.
  • Which Disney princess would make the best judge? – Snow White, because she’s the fairest of them all.
  • Why shouldn’t you give Elsa a balloon? – Because she’ll let it go.
  • What did Cinderella Dolphin wear to the ball? – Her glass flipper.
  • Why was the wrong Disney princess arrested? – The police thought she was someone Elsa.

Donald Duck Jokes

  • Why did Mickey Mouse get hit with a snowball? – Because Donald ducked.
  • When does Donald Duck wake up? – At the quack of dawn.
  • What do you call Donald Duck when he leads the orchestra? – A con-duck-tor.
  • What does Donald Duck like to snack on? – Salted Quackers.
  • What did Donald Duck say when the waitress came? – Put it on my bill!

Peter Pan Jokes

  • Why is Peter Pan flying all the time? – He Neverlands.
  • Where does Captain Hook go to get his hook replaced? – The second-hand store.
  • What’s Peter Pan’s favorite restaurant? – Wendy’s.
  • What did Captain Hook’s sidekick say to Adele? – Hello, it’s Smee!
  • Who has two thumbs and loves Peter Pan? – Not Captain Hook.

Add your favorite Disney joke to the comments.

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