Funny Car Jokes the Whole Family with Love

Whether you’re a grown-up car lover or a kid carrying around matchbox cars, these funny car jokes will crack you up.

You might also like our good morning jokes, birthday jokes, car puns, and jokes books for kids.

Car Jokes

Funny Car Jokes

  • What part of the car is the laziest? – The wheels, because they are always tired.
  • What do you do with old German cars? – You take ‘em to the old Volk’s home.
  • What makes cars not work properly when you change wheels? – Because they’re retired.
  • What kind of car does a sheep like to drive? – A lamborghini!
  • What do Michigan autoworkers do on Cinco de Mayo? – They have a Fort Fiesta.
  • What was wrong with the wooden car? – It wooden go!
  • What kind of cars do cooks drive? – Chef-rolets.
  • Why couldn’t the car play football? – It only had one boot!
  • What has four wheels and flies? – A garbage truck.

Driving Jokes

  • Who can drive all their customers away and still make money? – Taxi drivers.
  • What is the worst thing about parallel parking? – The witnesses.
  • What did the traffic light say to the car? – Hey! Don’t look, I’m about to change!
  • If you see an old person and a child in the road you’re driving on, what do you hit? – The Brakes!
  • What is true if everything is coming your way? – You’re in the wrong lane.

BMW Jokes

  • I use BMW to go to work. – Bus. Metro. Walk.
  • What did the young Honda say to the old BMW? – Ok beemer.
Car Jokes

Tesla Jokes

  • Who solved the mystery of the stolen Tesla? – Sherlock Ohms.
  • What did Peter Parker say to Elon Musk? – With great power comes great electricity bill.
  • If Tesla, SpaceX, and Neuralink started a band, what would it be called? – The Three Musk-eteers.

Jeep Jokes

  • What brand of car would the Roadrunner be? – Jeep Jeep.
  • Why didn’t Thomas Jefferson drive a Jeep Wrangler? – Because he always fought for LIBERTY!

Audi Jokes

  • What’s a cowboy’s favorite vehicle? – Audi, partner.
  • What do you call a Texan in an Audi? – Howdy.

Subaru Jokes

  • What do you call a Subaru in a lake? – A Scubaru.
  • If you drive a Subaru in reverse, what are you? – U r a bus.
  • What happens if you rear-end a Subaru? – You’ll be seeing stars.

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