Funny Car Jokes the Whole Family with Love

Whether you’re a grown-up car lover or a kid carrying around matchbox cars, these funny car jokes will crack you up.

You might also like our good morning jokes, birthday jokes, car puns, and jokes books for kids.

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Funny Car Jokes

• What part of the car is the laziest? – The wheels, because they are always tired.
• What do you do with old German cars? – You take ‘em to the old Volk’s home.
• What makes cars not work properly when you change wheels? – Because they’re retired.
• What kind of car does a sheep like to drive? – A lamborghini!
• What do Michigan autoworkers do on Cinco de Mayo? – They have a Fort Fiesta.
• What was wrong with the wooden car? – It wooden go!
• What kind of cars do cooks drive? – Chef-rolets.
• Why couldn’t the car play football? – It only had one boot!
• What has four wheels and flies? – A garbage truck.

Driving Jokes

• Who can drive all their customers away and still make money? – Taxi drivers.
• What is the worst thing about parallel parking? – The witnesses.
• What did the traffic light say to the car? – Hey! Don’t look, I’m about to change!
• If you see an old person and a child in the road you’re driving on, what do you hit? – The Brakes!
• What is true if everything is coming your way? – You’re in the wrong lane.

BMW Jokes

• I use BMW to go to work. – Bus. Metro. Walk.
• What did the young Honda say to the old BMW? – Ok beemer.

Tesla Jokes

• Who solved the mystery of the stolen Tesla? – Sherlock Ohms.
• What did Peter Parker say to Elon Musk? – With great power comes great electricity bill.
• If Tesla, SpaceX, and Neuralink started a band, what would it be called? – The Three Musk-eteers.

Jeep Jokes

• What brand of car would the Roadrunner be? – Jeep Jeep.
• Why didn’t Thomas Jefferson drive a Jeep Wrangler? – Because he always fought for LIBERTY!

Audi Jokes

• What’s a cowboy’s favorite vehicle? – Audi, partner.
• What do you call a Texan in an Audi? – Howdy.

Subaru Jokes

• What do you call a Subaru in a lake? – A Scubaru.
• If you drive a Subaru in reverse, what are you? – U r a bus.
• What happens if you rear-end a Subaru? – You’ll be seeing stars.

Add your favorite car joke to the comments.

For more giggly fun, check out these books:

• Best Joke Books for 7-year-olds
• Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link
• Laugh-out-Loud Jokes for Kids (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link
• National Geographic Kids Just Joking (check it out on Amazon here) – Affiliate link