Give your middle schoolers the punchline with these great jokes for middle schoolers! Perfect for getting a laugh out of friends any time of day!

100 Jokes for Middle Schoolers That Will Actually Make Them Laugh

Middle school kids are in a whole different world from elementary school and they know it. My son started middle school this year, and boy, I realized pretty quickly that this year is a horse of a different color! I’m not sure who was more excited about the school break, me or him. That’s exactly why I put together this list of the best funny jokes for middle schoolers, because a well-timed laugh goes a long way at this age.

Everyone loves a good joke, no matter what age you’re at. The best jokes for middle school kids are usually clean, safe for all scenarios, and easy to remember. Here are our top funny jokes for middle schoolers that you can share with your tweens to entertain and engage them and to help facilitate humor and connection during this often challenging age. The main goal here is to provide laughs!

What Are the Best Jokes for Middle School Kids?

Here are 100 school-appropriate jokes for middle schoolers that are easy to remember and guaranteed to get at least an eye-roll, if not a full laugh.

1. Did you hear about the stolen dog collar? Police are looking for leads.
2. How much does it cost to swim with sharks? An arm and a leg.
3. What do cake and baseball have in common? They both need a batter.
4. How do you cook an alligator? With a croc-pot.
5. What kind of jewelry do rabbits wear? 14 carrot gold.
6. What did the mama cow say to the baby cow? It’s pasture bedtime.
7. What’s the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano but you can’t tuna fish.
8. Two eggs went to a party. They had a shell of a time.
9. What do you call a herd of sheep falling down a hill? A lambslide.
10. Did you hear about the two rowboats that got into an argument? It was quite an oar-deal.
11. What kind of bug can tell time? A clock-roach.
12. Once I read a book about glue. I couldn’t put it down.
13. What kind of music should you listen to while fishing? Something catchy!
14. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten-tickles.
15. What’s the easiest building to lift? A lighthouse.
16. Why can’t leopards play hide-and-seek? Because they’re always spotted.
17. What kind of music do elves listen to? Wrap music.
18. What do you call a rude cow? Beef jerky.
19. Did you hear about the broken guitar for sale? It comes with no strings attached.
20. Why did the Oreo go to the dentist? It lost its filling.
21. What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater.
22. How do mice floss their teeth? With string cheese.
23. How did the piano get locked out of its car? It lost its keys.
24. What should you do if you meet a giant? Use big words.
25. What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.
26. Why did the deer go to the dentist? It had buck teeth.
27. Why are frogs good at baseball? They know how to catch fly balls.
28. What did the beach say when the tide came in? Long time no sea.
29. Why are most people tired on April 1? They’ve just finished a 31-day March.
30. Why did the drum go to bed? It was beat.
31. What do you give the dentist of the year? A little plaque.
32. Why did the whale blush? It saw the ocean’s bottom.
33. What do you call a moose with no name? Anonymoose.
34. Where do penguins go to vote? The North Poll.
35. What do clouds wear beneath their pants? Thunderwear.
36. Where do birds stay when they travel? Someplace cheep.
37. What did the fish say after swimming into a cement wall? “Dam.”
38. Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France? Apparently, da brie is everywhere.
39. Why did the rabbit go to the salon? It was having a bad hare day.
40. Did you hear about the fire at the shoe factory? Many soles were lost.
41. How much money does a skunk have? Just one scent.
42. What did the tree say when spring finally arrived? What a re-leaf.
43. Why did the computer go to bed? It needed to crash.
44. What did the horse say after he tripped? “I’ve fallen and I can’t giddy up.”
45. What kind of bird works on a construction site? A crane.
46. What is a calendar’s favorite food? Dates.
47. Why did the watch go on vacation? To unwind.
48. Why did the car take a nap? It was tired.
49. What do you call someone who raises hens? A chicken tender.
50. I told my mom I’d call her later, but she said she prefers “Mom.”
51. I don’t tell dad jokes that often. But when I do, he laughs.
52. Why did the phone wear glasses? Because it lost all its contacts.
53. What’s the best way to get to the hospital after breaking your foot? Toe truck.
54. Where do boats go when they’re sick? To the dock.
55. Why did the frog take the bus to work? His car got toad.
56. How did the farmer fix his torn overalls? With a cabbage patch.
57. What do you give a scientist with bad breath? Experi-mints.
58. What did the hamburger name its baby? Patty.
59. Did you hear about the cleaners who went to space? They ended up scrubbing the mission.
60. Where do books hide when they’re afraid? Under their covers.
61. What did one toilet say to the other? You look a bit flushed.
62. Why did the guy get fired from the calendar factory? He took a day off.
63. What kind of felines can bowl? Alley cats.
64. What do you call a happy cowboy? A jolly rancher.
65. When does Friday come before Thursday? In the dictionary.
66. Why shouldn’t you trust trees? They seem shady.
67. Where’s the one place you should never take your dog? The flea market.
68. What did one leaf say to the other? I’m falling for you.
69. How do you get a mouse to smile? Say “cheese!”
70. I wanted to take a bath, but decided to leave it where it is.
71. A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Why the long face?”
72. What do you call birds that stick together? Velcrows.
73. What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
74. What did the blanket say to the bed? I’ve got you covered.
75. How do birds learn to fly? They wing it.
76. What do you call a fly with a sore throat? A hoarse fly.
77. What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer? A father-in-law.
78. How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste.
79. What do you call a shoe made out of a banana? A slipper.
80. Did you hear the rumor about butter? Everyone is spreading it.
81. Why did the cow go to Hollywood? To be in the moooo-vies.
82. What do you call recently-married spiders? Newly-webs.
83. What kind of cereal do leprechauns eat? Lucky charms.
84. What do you get when you cross a Smurf and a cow? Blue cheese.
85. Why did the snowman buy a bag of carrots? He wanted to pick his nose.
86. What did the Dalmatian say after dinner? That hit the spot.
87. How does Darth Vader like his bagels? On the dark side.
88. What do cows like to read? Cattle-logs.
89. Why did the thief take a shower before robbing the bank? He wanted to make a clean getaway.
90. Why was the traffic light late to work? It took too long to change.
91. Getting paid to sleep would be my dream job.
92. Why did police arrest the turkey? They suspected fowl play.
93. What do you call two ducks and a cow? Quackers and milk.
94. What do you call it when a cow grows facial hair? A moooo-stache.
95. How many feet are in a yard? It depends on how many people are standing there.
96. What month has 28 days? All of them.
97. Why doesn’t it hurt if someone throws a can of Coke at your head? Because it’s a soft drink.
98. What do you get when you cross an ornery sheep with a crabby cow? A real baa-d moo-d.
99. What do kids play when they have nothing else to do? Bored games.
100. Who do you call to clean the ocean? Mermaids.
101. What musical instrument is in the bathroom? Tuba toothpaste. 
102. What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree! 
103. What’s a tornado’s favorite game? Twister! 
104. What is a fake noodle called? Impasta! 
105. What is the sound a dinosaur makes when sleeping? Dino-snore. 
106. What’s an elephant that doesn’t matter called? Irrelephant. 
107. Why do you never give Elsa anything to hold? Because she’ll let it go! 
108. Where do polar bears hide all their money? In the snow bank.
109. What do you call a pig that plays basketball? A ball hog. 
110. What did the limestone say to the geologist and the rest of the rocks? Don’t take me for granite! 
111. Why did the middle schooler eat their homework? Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake. 
112. What did the paper say to the pencil? Write on! 
113. • 13. What did the janitor scream when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!

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Ready to Make Your Middle Schooler Laugh?

Sharing funny jokes for middle schoolers offers an excellent way to ease tension, create memorable family moments, show your fun side, and open the door for conversations about other, more serious topics. Use humor as a connection tool in your parenting.

Be sure to visit our page for more fun content and more jokes for kids!

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