connect with kids – look them in the eye
When you talk to your kids (or any kids for that matter) how do position your body? Hmmm, is that a strange question? I have a good reason for asking, so give it some thought. 😉
Do you stand tall over them and look down?
Or do you squat down and look them in the eye?
The simple action of getting down on kid level will make for an even stronger connection in the conversation.  Don’t worry if you can’t squat.  There are lots of ways to get down to kid level!  Sit on a chair, sit on the ground, squat or kneel down.  Anything that brings you eye to eye.
Look at Little M’s neck in this picture. Â She has to lean her head way back to talk to her Auntie L. Â Their faces are actually very far apart and eye contact is difficult. Â Can you imagine talking to everyone like this?
When Auntie L squats down in front of her, Little M easily shares her story face to face.  Getting down on kid level helps kids learn the important skill of eye contact while conversing.  It also show’s that you are ready to give your full attention.  Doesn’t that sound like a wonderful way to enter a conversation?
So I ask again, how do you  position your body when talking to kids?
Simple parenting tricks like this one can make all the difference when comes to really connecting with your kids.
And that’s why I decided to say YES!
Limit Screen Time
Dinner Conversation
This post originally appeared on May 9, 2012.
Great post, Jillian! I’ve tested this with kids of all ages, and it really does make a difference. Your photos illustrate the point perfectly.
Thank you Rachelle! I agree kids (and adults) of all ages prefer to be looked in the eye.
Hi Jillian! That’s a good one. I, myself believe that the most important thing in a conversation is to maintain eye to eye contact. Practicing it with your children will teach them this valuable lesson; which is needed for rest of the life.
Nice post. Loved that.
-Emily
Thank you Emily! I agree that eye contact is a life skill that everyone should learn.
This is fabulous! 🙂 I do get down on my daughter’s level most of the time and ask for her to have eye contact. This is a fabulous reminder of WHY it’s important to do so! 🙂 Thanks for a great post!
Thank you Rebekah.
The other day we had friends over who are professional clowns. Well as you can imagine, they started entertaining our daughter (16 months old) and eventually a dance-off occured. When my daughter realized that our friends husband was towering over her and she had to look up, she started to point to the floor motioning him to go down. This is something we taught her to do with our dog. So I am thinking that in her little head she said, “This guy needs to come down to my level and dance with me.” I have been trying to use this tactic with her because she tends to respond better to me if she gets into things (kitchen cabinets, closets, etc. ) and she will stop. If I tower over her it’s seems as though I am talking to the wall and she continues. So I do have to remind myself to get down to her level. Good advice.
What a lovely story! I love that you are teaching her to communicate what she wants. Did he come down to her level?
I forgot to mention, that she kept pointing down and when I connected the dots, he did just that. He got down on his knees and kept dancing with her. It amazes me how parents have to decipher, translate, and interpret baby and body language (I am a new mom).
Sounds like you are doing a terrific job! (Glad your friend was able to accommodate her!)
Eye contact is so important. Love your visual.
Thanks Trisha. 🙂
Appreciate the way you illustrated this post. We don’t realize how we come off to children. By getting down to their level we show them just how valuable they are instead of towering over them to show them how “powerful” we are.
I love that. I certainly don’t need my kids to feel that I have “power” over them. Thanks for the comment. 🙂
This is fantastic! Such a good reminder to all of us.
Thank you!
Great post! I have always done this, instinctively, even before I became a mom. I would always kneel/squat down with my nephew and niece when talking with them. It’s more pleasant for *me* to be able to look them in the face when interacting with them, let alone for them!
I agree that it’s more pleasant for the adults as well as the kids. Nicely said!
What a great post and a wonderful way to make it visual! One of my teaching mentors always said that working with children was great exercise because you have to do a lot of deep squats! Eye contact really is so critical. Thanks for pointing that out in such an effective way!
Ha ha! When my son was little I joked with friends that they could just borrow him instead of joining a gym. Kids are a great workout!